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Like the dinosaurs themselves, Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom is a clone of its predecessor…a big budget spectacle that’s all style and no substance.

While in the midst of working on a major article for Morbidly Beautiful, I took a break to catch the latest installment of Universal’s dino extravaganza Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom. Excitement was at a fever pitch for the film, with it already breaking records overseas and a big box office weekend in store for its North America release.

The film is a totally fun popcorn movie in every sense of the term.

The dinosaurs are scarier than they ever have been, thanks to a generous blend of digital and practical effects. Sadly none of this translates into a great film. I’m not going to say the movie sucked, because it didn’t suck, however it’s really just meh. It feels like the middle part of a trilogy — with many doors left open and loose ends untied that will all be fixed in the next installment (which is coming June 2021).

In all honesty, this is not a spoiler either, it is basically The Lost World 2.0, and that’s not an exaggeration! It uses so many elements of the original sequel, they should’ve just called this The Lost World 2K18.

  1. Spunky Redhead sent on a suicide mission — involving dinosaurs in danger on an island inhabited by said creatures — at the request of an eccentric billionaire? Check.
  2. One of the series’ most popular characters also being coerced into joining the same mission because of that spunky redhead? Check.
  3. The addition of two new characters to the franchise, who possess skills necessary to survive that mission but are also potential dino food? Check.
  4. Military group already on the island for another reason who end up being bad guys? Check.
  5. Dinosaur stampede? Check.
  6. Jeff Goldblum? Check.

Actually, that last point brings us to another low point of the film…not nearly enough Goldblum.

He’s barely in it. I’d call it a high grade cameo at best.

I could go on. But when you see the film, you’ll likely notice plenty of other similarities between this film and its predecessor. Chris Pratt and Bryce Dallas Howard, usually on point in other projects, have barely anything to work with here. Granted, they still work with what they have, but they deserve better.

The humor, which is another staple of the series, is almost nil — or, even worse, feels forced. There is an interesting little twist in this film. However, a blind man could see it coming from a mile away. I should also point out that there’s a brief post-credits scene, but it really just serves to further the movie’s finale — not the most enthusiastic note to end on.

I know it seems as if I’m dumping all over this movie (and maybe I am), but the positives fail to outweigh the negatives in this entry. For my money, Deadpool 2 and Avengers:Infinty War are still the kings of Summer.

The Park Is Gone, and hopefully after the next installment, it goes extinct.

2 out of 5 Dino Eggs

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