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We continue our recap of the entire Riverdale series with episodes 6 and 7 of the first season, “Faster Pussycats! Kill! Kill!” and “In a Lonely Place”.

Join us for our weekly recap of the entire Riverdale series, starting with the first episode of Season 1. This will be a bi-weekly column (every Tuesday and Thursday), with two episodes reviewed each time, until we get caught up with the latest season. Catch up on everything you might have missed using the links below, or just dive right into to episodes 6 and 7 of the first season of Riverdale.

Season 1
Episode 1: The River’s Edge
Episodes 2 and 3: Touch of Evil and Body Double
Episodes 4 and 5: The Last Picture Show and Heart of Darkness


Episode 6: “Faster Pussycat! Kill! Kill!” Synopsis

Hermione has begun to work for the Andrews’ family company, getting even closer with Fred and discovering that his financials are in the pit in the process. He’s hoping that developing on the Twilight Drive-in lot will put him back in good financial straits. Veronica struggles with Hermione and Fred’s relationship, even more so after Hermione forges her signature to give Fred the contract.

Betty and Jughead discover that Polly is at the home of the Sisters of Quiet Mercy, and they travel so she can be reunited with her — only to discover upon getting there that Polly is pregnant with Jason Blossom’s baby. The latter two kiss before finding Jason’s varsity jacket and some drugs in an abandoned car, which is set on fire by someone who was watching them. Polly escapes the Sisters.

Valerie almost splinters off from the Pussycats to sing with Archie at the high school’s variety show, only to return back to the Pussycats in the eleventh hour, leaving Archie to perform alone to rapturous applause.

Observations

— Tiny Betty’s nightlight is creepy as hell, and the fact that she still has it says a lot about both her and her family. Speaking of her family, I still love Madchen Amick but I’m starting to hate Alice. I was already indifferent about Hal, so nothing’s really changed. His actor is fine.

— Veronica’s a very supportive friend and so is Valerie. I really don’t want this to become even more of a love triangle thing, but I highly doubt whether that’s going to happen.

— Good to see they’re going with Hermione/Fred and not Fred/Grundy (aka Gibson) Her absence from this show feels like a cleansing. I’m happy for both of them, maybe he can help her.

— Archie, you’re so bad with relationships. I feel like that’s probably tied into his experiences with Gibson. The boy needs therapy, because being abused like that can really mess with your head. Maybe being with Valerie will help? She seems stable enough.

— Adding Veronica in a backlash move before the show was a good strategic move on Josie’s part. I loved their bonding time together, and while I’m happy that Valerie came back to sing with the Pussycats I do hope to see more interactions between the two of them. That being said, it was really sweet that Valerie came back to the Pussycats to help Josie.

— Veronica’s underage, right? She’s the same age as everyone else? If so, I’m pretty sure making Veronica a legal officer of the Lodge family business isn’t legal. Then again, nothing Hiram does is legal apparently, so why am I even surprised. Still, bad on Hermione for forging her signature even if it was to help Fred.

— The nunnery is terrifying It makes me genuinely extremely anxious and I hate it. Good for Polly for breaking out, bad for her for doing it while bleeding and very much alone.

— The Cooper sister reunion is precious, and I’m so happy that they get to have that time together. I wish I could see more of them together, but sadly the circumstances of the show won’t allow that to happen. Rest in peace my dreams for that, I guess.

— I don’t like Jughead and Betty as a couple. It just seems like a bad pairing off. Maybe that’ll change, but for now it’s iffy.

— Archie’s plot was kinda boring. He’s kinda boring.

— Riverdale Parents Ranking: Fred, Sierra, Hermione, Myles, Alice and Hal. Polly, while pregnant, does not count as a Riverdale parent. Myles is above Alice and Hal because, while he left during Josie’s performance, at least he didn’t lie to her constantly.

Quotables

Top cursed lines from this episode:

“What do you say Archiekins, are you the Jay to my Bey?” – Veronica

The phrase, ‘you ginger Judas’ – also Veronica.


Episode 7: “In a Lonely Place” Synopsis

The Lodges begin a cold war — fighting against each other because of what Hermione did. After a financial battle of wits, they compromise over both her relationship with Fred and over the Lodge-Andrews partnership and tell Hiram about the forgery over the phone from his cell in prison.

Jughead, still homeless, goes from living in the high school to living with Archie and his father — who forges a time card for July 11th for Jughead so he isn’t a suspect in the death of Jason Blossom. The Blossoms, meanwhile, begin to blame the now escaped Polly for Jason’s death. Alice reveals that Polly is pregnant and pleads for her to come home — although Betty knows that she’s hidden away in the Cooper family attic.  Upon learning this, the Blossom parents start grappling for the baby while Cheryl just wants to help her frenemies. Polly eventually ends up staying with the Lodges.

Observations

— I genuinely hated the dream sequence. It made me feel kinda grossed out. I did appreciate the fact that this is apparently the only way the Cooper sisters get to be happy though. That and the dress Betty was wearing. I’m a sucker for 50s fashion.

— Jughead has ascended to living in the high school now! At least the high school has a shower, so that’s some tiny form of an improvement. By the end of the episode he’s living with the Andrews, so that’s an even larger improvement.

— I still don’t like the concept of Betty and Jughead as a couple. It’s good that they support each other, but they just don’t fit together.

— You know what’s the worst thing? Jughead’s a bad name and so is Jellybean: their actual names are Forsythe and Forsythia. That’s in comics canon. Jughead sucks as a name, but it’s better than Forsythe.

— Good petty revenge on Veronica’s part, kudos to her. Equal kudos to Hermione for cancelling her credit card and reporting it stolen as payback, and good for them both for actually talking about this whole mess like a family.

— Cheryl yo-yoed for me on this episode. She was still as wonderfully bitchy as ever, but the tweet was a low blow. But learning about the baby — her niece or nephew — seemed to turn her to the side of good. Or at least the side of best interest. Her parents still suck though.

— I don’t know why the River Vixens matter so much to Cheryl considering that we haven’t seen how they are without her. Who took her place as captain? Was it Ginger or Tina? It’s the little things in this show that get me.

— FP: good aesthetics, not a good parent. Might also be a murderer if that jacket in his closet means anything. But he’s starting to try and that counts for something. Maybe not in court, but still.

— All of the evidence against Jughead is circumstantial, but I can admit that the fingerprints on the car were suspicious. It was nice to see his father care enough about him to come into the station and threaten a cop though – like that’s a good way to deal with that.

— Being a true crime fan, I enjoyed the reference to the Paradise Lost Kids, aka the West Memphis Three. Especially in conjunction with the theory that’s floating out there that the Blossom family is part of a satanic cult.

— If we don’t see a reunion of the Fred-Heads at some point during this series, I’ll count it as a personal affront. I need to hear what that sounded like. It probably wasn’t good but I still want to hear it. Also, giving Fred some musical background was a nice move, and it gives some background to Archie by proxy.

— Polly being with the Lodges might help them bond again — or maybe it won’t completely matter. You can never tell with this show. At least she’s safe and so is the baby. For now.

— Riverdale Parents Ranking: Fred, Hermione, FP, Alice, Hal, The Blossoms.

Quotables

Top cursed lines from this episode:

“Some retail therapy to salve my emotional wounds, a few treasures from Glamazon.” – Veronica

Hearing about the Fredheads counts, only for the band name.

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