Microbudget Monday: I Watched Her Grow (2024)

“I Watched Her Grow” blooms with ambitious ideas and representation, even as it struggles against the constraints of its modest resources.

The quote above is my all-time favorite, and I quote it often when I’m trying to summon the courage to push through my mental blocks and fear of failure.

We all want to blossom, but so much stands in our way, often keeping us wrapped in a bud of worries, insecurities, and doubt. My favorite author, Jeanette Winterson, has a similar quote I love: “What you risk reveals what you value.” Attempting to blossom in a world that doesn’t recognize your value is terrifying. Yet, the alternative is even more horrific.

As Nin mused, the process of “becoming” is an essential part of being human, yet so many of us elect to remain in one state without ever growing and evolving. “This is a kind of death.” 

I Watched Her Grow (2024), written and directed by Shea Formanes, is an ambitious and heartfelt debut that explores this idea of becoming and the ways in which grief, generational trauma, and the perception of others conspire to keep us from being who we are meant to be.

It’s a tale of loss, female empowerment, sacrifice, and healing through the lens of an ultra-low-budget coming-of-age fairytale.

The film follows Ada (Michelle Colman Padron), an isolated botanist whose life is upended by the arrival of Wren (Taylor Freeman), an enigmatic teenage runaway. As their unexpected bond deepens, both women must confront their tortured pasts and face an uncertain future, embarking on a harrowing journey of self-discovery and healing.

I Watched Her Grow begins with Ada as a child, caring for her sick mother (Eloisa Cardona). One day, her mother unexpectedly dies, leaving Ada to be raised by a family friend (Aarti Tiwari). The loss is too profound for Ada to fully recover from, causing her to isolate herself from the world. But when she encounters Wren alone in the woods seven years later, she knows she can’t just leave the scared and helpless girl to fend for herself. Thus, she reluctantly invites the teen to stay with her.

The two guarded women begin to bond, seemingly drawn to each other through a shared connection they can’t quite explain — at least, not at first. We soon learn that Wren is harboring a secret that haunts her and makes it difficult for her, like Ada, to live fully in the world. As for Ada, she’s got her own secrets that keep her rooted in memories of a painful past.

At its core, I Watched Her Grow is a story about this unexpected connection between two women who don’t understand how much they need each other. 

Padron and Freeman create an interesting dynamic with strong chemistry, bringing depth to their characters’ evolving relationship. Their performances anchor the film, providing emotional resonance to Formanes’ exploration of isolation, otherness, and the power of human connection.

Formanes brings some intriguing ideas to the table, weaving parables about dying with dignity, a mother’s love, and the complexities of familial relationships. The film also delves into the isolation that comes from feeling different and out of place in society.

Using plants as a metaphor for growth, change, and finding the courage to blossom in adversity, the director crafts a narrative that feels both creative and unique.

However, the film’s execution falls short of its lofty ambitions. With a lean runtime of just over an hour, Formanes attempts to pack in a wealth of ideas and themes, resulting in a story that often feels underdeveloped.

The film’s technical aspects betray its shoestring budget, with flat cinematography, choppy editing, and issues with audio quality that prevent full immersion. The use of obviously fake plastic flowers as crucial props further detracts from the film’s authenticity. Much can be forgiven, given the film’s limited resources and the learning curve of a first-time director. Still, it’s a garden littered with weeds that may make appreciating its beauty difficult for the casual viewer.

Further, the dialogue-heavy nature of the script may not appeal to viewers seeking a more narratively satisfying or thrilling experience. Instead, I Watched Her Grow is a film that invites audiences to think, feel, and engage with cinema as a means of exploring the complicated and often painful scope of human existence.

It’s worth noting that the film was a crowdfunded effort, made for an estimated budget of around $10,000.

Formanes, inspired by her experiences as an Asian-American filmmaker, set out to address issues of prejudice and discrimination against marginalized communities in the United States. Her goal of creating stories celebrating differences and featuring diverse characters is admirable, even if the execution falls short.

The film boasts a cast made up entirely of women, with over 50% of the crew consisting of women and more than 75% identifying as BIPOC. This commitment to diversity both in front of and behind the camera earned the film the prestigious ReFrame Stamp, recognizing its efforts to hire women, non-binary, gender non-conforming, and trans individuals in key production roles.

Formanes cites impressive inspirations such as Carrie, Winter’s Bone, and Pan’s Labyrinth.

While the film never reaches those heights, one can appreciate the ambitious vision behind it. The core message – everyone has and deserves an opportunity to grow and blossom – is both poignant and universal.

Ultimately, I Watched Her Grow is a rough-around-the-edges debut that showcases Formanes’ potential as a filmmaker with important stories to tell.

While the film’s technical limitations may deter some viewers, its heartfelt exploration of human connection and resilience in the face of adversity is worthy of recognition.

As Formanes gains more experience, it will be interesting to see how her unique perspective and commitment to diverse storytelling evolve in future projects.

I Watched Her Grow held its World Premiere at the Toronto International Nollywood Film Festival on September 12, 2024.