Morbidly Beautiful

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Chaos and Carnage discuss teen angst and other horrors while debating the merits of Shudder’s new werewolf horror film, “Teddy”.

Rather Werewolf or this Podcast?



Teddy. This is what happens when you add several cups of Napoleon Dynamite to a few ounces of Teen Wolf and just the tiniest splash of horror and mix it all up. Bake at 420 degrees for about an hour and twenty eight minutes and voila! Teddy; the go-nowhere teen with a penchant for ewe eating. And maybe some people killing.

If you are a new listener to the PaNcast, be aware there are spoilers and expletives ahead! We break down the movie, go through a summary, offer analysis, trivia, arbitrary awards, reviews, ratings, fanfiction, and more!

“Shudder lied to Carnage and she accidentally picked a revenge pick and things will go awry shortly.” – Carnage’s Five Second Summary. 

High school dropout, Teddy, is living the okayish life with his aunt…mom…and Peppin, who honestly we have no idea if they are related or roommates or what. His still in high school girlfriend, Becca, (EW, Carnage! As Chaos would say) is finishing up her last year of high school. He has a solid job working at a massage parlor with a sexual predator for a boss. He is going places. Not far and nowhere awesome, but going places.

Then comes a run in with a werewolf which Teddy thinks is just a plain old, little red riding hood wolf. He goes after it with a stick and some foul language only to come away with a wound on his waist. Then the ewes start dying. It really is the silence of the lambs because they are all dead.

Still, everything is okay until Becca decides to dump her shiftless beau for a classmate. This will not bode well for Becca, her new beau, or any of their classmates.

Make sure to watch Teddy so you aren’t spoiled like a tongue that has been chewed up and spit out. Then check out this week’s episode to find out how angry Chaos gets at Carnage for this pick.

Teddy is streaming on Shudder.


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