If you think your Valentine’s Day was bad, wait until you discover the sheer 80’s madness of “Hospital Massacre”.
In honor of Valentine’s Day, the Spookshow gang sat down to watch the 1982 slasher “Hospital Massacre” aka “X-Ray” to find out what happens when an awkward young boy gets jilted on the day of love. Since it was produced by Cannon Films, author Austin Trunick joins the crew with a special Cannon Chronicles segment, and we get Cannon Ball ratings as well as the usual star ratings.
Hospital Massacre was directed by Boaz Davidson and starred Barbi Benton. It follows a woman who becomes trapped on an empty hospital floor, where a murderer posing as a surgeon attempts to kill her.
The film begins in 1961 when an unpopular boy named Harold leaves a Valentine’s Day card for his crush, the beautiful Susan Jeremy. When Susan and her friend David humiliate Harold, he seeks murderous revenge on David. Nineteen years later, Susan gets dropped off at the hospital by her new boyfriend, Jack, to pick up some routine test results.
Watch the trailer right here. Hospital Massacre is available to stream for free on Tubi.
Unfortunately for Susan, there’s a murderer on the loose in the hospital. Fortunately, a friendly intern named Harry is happy to help ensure she gets out of there as soon as possible. It’s Valentine’s Day. All anyone wants is someone’s heart. What could go wrong?
Thin on plot and drenched in cheesy slasher tropes, this one didn’t exactly wow the critics. But that doesn’t mean it’s not a bloody good time. One critic even referred to it as ’80s slasher junk food, which may not have been meant as a compliment but actually sounds like high praise indeed.
If you haven’t seen this one, it’s pretty infamous for being absolutely bonkers, even by ’80s slasher standards. It also stars the stunning Playboy model Barbi Benton in her feature film debut.
HOSPITAL MASSACRE may not make you fall in love, but it’s not bad company if you like a little bloody absurdity. And it may make you feel better about your Valentine’s Day. Let’s discuss!
IN CASE YOU MISSED IT:
While we’re on the subject of holiday horror, the Spookshow crew checked out 2021’s The Advent Calendar just before Christmas. This French film follows Eva, an ex-dancer who is now living in a wheelchair, unable to walk. When her friend Sophie gives her an old wooden antique advent calendar before Christmas, she realizes each window contains a surprise that triggers repercussions in real life: some good, but most bad. Now Eva will have to choose between getting rid of the calendar or walking again… even if it causes death around her.
Join Josh & Donny as they discuss whether or not this film was a present worth opening!
ABOUT THE SHOW:
Since 2018, the All-American Spookshow team has reviewed Horror films, Cult classics, and Action flicks, plus, of course, total crap, so you don’t have to — but we encourage you to nonetheless. Every 2 weeks, the gang reviews a Horror movie with spoilers, alternating between older films (1999-back) & newer films (2000-present). Every other week, they alternate between a few different series, Spookshow Spotlight, Cult Corner, and Cannon Fodder.
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