The Daily Dig: The Zero Boys (1986)

“Red Dawn” without the political implications, “Cabin in the Woods” without the Zombies, and “Evil Dead” without the cursed book and demons.

A group of paintballers find themselves in a real fight with cold-blooded killers. Let’s dig into 1986’s THE ZERO BOYS, directed by Nico Mastorakis!

As I See It

The film starts out with a paintball match that intentionally feels like a real-life soldier’s exercise and feels quite a bit like Red Dawn, the eighties action hit starring Charlie Sheen and Patrick Swayze that was remade in 2011 starring Chris Hemsworth.

By Act II, we’re in Friday the 13th or even more appropriately Cabin in the Woods orbit. Maybe a little Evil Dead for good measure.

If the set looks familiar, it’s for good reason. It was filmed at the same studio (Veluzat Motion Picture Ranch in Saugus, California) as Friday the 13th Part 3, Friday the 13th – The Final Chapter, House of 1000 Corpses, the TV series Westworld, and the Chris Farley/David Spade comedy Black Sheep.

We’re not dealing with a cinematic masterpiece here, but the pacing will keep you engaged, and much of the action makes up for deficiencies in the writing. It’s a solid, memorable Action/Thriller.

Famous Faces

Kelli Maroney (Jamie) was an ’80s horror icon, starring in Night of the Comet, Jim Wynorski’s Chopping Mall, Not of This Earth, Transylvania Twist, and Scream Queen Hot Tub Party (along with Fred Olen Ray). Do you need more of a reason to bow to the Scream Queen?

Nicole Rio (Sue) played Tracy in Sorority House Massacre.

Joe Estevez (Killer) is the brother of actor Martin Sheen and therefore the uncle of both Charlie Sheen and Emilio Estevez. He’s been in a ton of B movies, but none that stick out to me. There is one title: Legend of the Roller Blade Seven where he starred alongside Frank Stallone (Sly’s brother) and Karen Black in a post-apocalyptic story where everyone gets around by rollerblading. I’m sold based on that short premise.

Tom Shell (Larry) was in Surf Nazis Must Die, Hard Rock Nightmare, and Fred Olen Ray’s Beverly Hills Vamp, Teenage Exorcist, and Bikini Drive-In.

Of Gratuitous Nature

It’s not bursting at the seams, but there is the requisite sexuality and nudity you would expect in a “slasher in the woods” film from the eighties.

Heartthrob

Give me that Hans Zimmer score! Zimmer is on my Mount Rushmore of film score composers, along with the late and great John Williams, Danny Elfman, Ennio Morricone, Jerry Goldsmith, Howard Shore, James Horner, and Christopher Young. It’s a big mountain. This score may not show the sound and style that would make Hans Zimmer so discernible, but it’s still a great trivia answer!

Here, along with his mentor Stanley Myers (The Deer Hunter), he went more the Harry Manfredini route, complementing what’s on the screen with dark, ominous synth and strings.

Ripe for a Remake

All the devices are there to update this and make it a fun, modern horror film. It doesn’t necessarily have to be a remake, but being inspired by or in the spirit of would work just fine.

Spawns

No progeny to report.

Where to Watch

Arrow Video released a Blu-ray/DVD combo featuring new and original artwork by the legendary Graham Humphries (Evil Dead). You can stream it on Apple TV and Arrow’s proprietary player.